The Macra Terror

Episode 1

After being spoiled by watching two consecutive stories with a mere 50% missing, we're back to another completely missing story. This doesn't seem to worry Hannah for once; after the cliffhanger at the end of the last episode, she's keen to see the giant crab monsters she recognised from the David Tennant episode "Gridlock".

Hannah: I'm excited, despite it not being real. I don't remember who originally told me that the Macra are a recurring species, but I liked the fact that they were a throwback, and even though I'd never seen any old Doctor Who I liked it whenever they referred back to it. They were a very small and inconsequential part of that episode and I wondered how big and important and impressive they were when they first came around, so I'm curious to finally see them now, especially considering it's something I've known about for eleven years.

For the first time since the series began, we get a brand new title sequence.

Hannah: This is different.
Me: Nothing gets past you, does it?
Hannah: Is this the first time they've changed it?
Me: Don't you know?
Hannah: Why would I?
Me: Because you've watched all of them!
Hannah: I don't like the "Doctor Who" bit as much as the previous one.
Me: What bit?
Hannah: The font. And I don't like his face being in it; it feels unnecessary and it ruins the abstract effect.
Me: Have you noticed what's not different?
Hannah: The music.
Me: Exactly. They've changed the title sequence, but the musical arrangement doesn't change until partway through the next story.
Hannah: Why would you do that?! Was it not ready?
Me: What do you think of the new opening?
Hannah: It's not a drastic change; it's the same style and a similar camera effect, just with the Doctor's face added to it. It's not bad and I don't dislike it, but it's not strikingly different. I really like the camera effect, though; I'll be sad when it goes.

Speaking of different music, Hannah's ears are immediately assaulted by the sound of a marching band, complete with accompaniment from a drum majorette.

Hannah: Oh, hello! This is different.
Me: It's a holiday camp. Like Butlins, although possibly not quite as frightening.
Hannah: It says it's a colony.
Me: Well, yes, it's a colony in the style of a holiday camp.
Hannah: Those are some very short skirts.

Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves, so Hannah is immediately suspicious.

Hannah: I'm immediately suspicious. No entire group of people should be that jolly without some creepy background reason.

Before we can delve into the thorny issue of children's TV presenters, our heroes arrive at the colony. Jamie is suspicious of the strange colonists.

Hannah: I like him, he's usually right. I'm wary of everything that's different, just in case, because you could do anything wrong. If you go to visit other cultures and things, you could do something wrong and instantly be killed.

The Doctor and friends are offered spa-treatment hospitality. One of the colonists, Medok, is believed to be insane and has been arrested for trying to escape; after snorting derisively at Ben's colony-issue sunglasses, Hannah turns her attention to the mystery at hand.

Hannah: Is it that you're not allowed to be unhappy, or something?
Me: No, but you've just anticipated the plot of a Sylvester McCoy adventure.
Hannah: Maybe some kind of Macra mind-control thing that doesn't work on some people. Is the Controller actually appearing on those monitors, or is it supposed to be a still image? It's hard to tell from a reconstruction, when you're watching nothing but still images.
Me: Yes, it's meant to be a still image with his voice over it. Just like Big Brother in Nineteen Eighty-Four.

The Doctor slips away to find Medok.

Hannah: He likes to stick his nose in everywhere and right wrongs. I like how the Doctor always identifies and seeks out the different and the repressed.

The colony's purpose is to mine a poisonous gas.

Hannah: Is that what the Macra feed on? I can't remember what they do in the David Tennant episode.
Me: They've devolved into mindless predators by then, but here they're intelligent and manipulative parasites.
Hannah: I remember they needed to live in the fumes at the bottom of the motorway.
Me: Well, that's the other thing. In this story the colonists are mining poisonous gas, which is what the Macra feed on, and then in "Gridlock" they're living off the exhaust fumes. So bringing them back wasn't just an arbitrary choice; it all fits together.
Hannah: Look at the miners and their neat little tunics. I like a square neck.

The cliffhanger sees the Doctor and Medok exploring a building site after curfew and being confronted by a giant crab. ("Oh! Light-up eyes. Very natural.")

Hannah: Very interesting so far; it's not what I was expecting.
Me: What were you expecting?
Hannah: I have no idea. Just crabs.
Me: You thought it would be more of a generic monster plot, with giant crabs on the rampage?
Hannah: I just thought there'd be more crabs.

Episode 2

Hannah: What else did Ian Stewart Black write?
Me: The Savages.
Hannah: Ah, that'll be why it's so good. And why there's a futuristic society with a dark secret.
Me: This is the last of his three stories; he also wrote The War Machines.

The Controller announces to the colony that there's no such thing as Macra. He seems awfully insistent about it.

Hannah: So one Macra, two Macra.
Me: What?
Hannah: One Macra, two Macra.
Me: Are you feeling okay?
Hannah: There's no difference between singular or plural?
Me: No.
Hannah: I knew "Macra" was plural, but I was wondering what the singular was. It's not a Macrum?
Me: I think that's Latin.

Ben, Jamie and Polly go to bed, but while they sleep a subliminal command urges them to conform to the colony. The Doctor manages to reach Polly and Jamie before the conditioning can take effect, but he's too late to save Ben.

Hannah: Oh no, they got Ben. How did the Macra establish all this mind-control technology? They're giant creatures with claws; how would they have gotten into everybody's rooms and built mind-control into the walls? Surely it's a human-built city, which means it was humans who put the nerve wires in the walls and installed the gas vents. That infrastructure must have existed before the Macra started using it for their own purposes; either that, or they had a more natural and biological way of brainwashing people to start with, and then they got those people to build this infrastructure to help them maintain it at a much better level.
Me: Or they just found some people who will do whatever they're told when they're threatened by giant crabs.
Hannah: How long have these people been at the colony? Who was on the planet first; humans or Macra? Maybe the colony had mind-control to start with, just to make everybody happy and work together.
Me: Or maybe the Macra are the indigenous population, and it's the humans who have invaded their planet.

And while we're on the subject of conditioning...

Hannah: Every now and then, it looks like Polly has had a really drastic haircut. It looks like she's had a pixie cut.
Me: That's exactly it.
Hannah: No, I mean... are you sure?
Me: Yes.
Hannah: I just thought it was pulled back.
Me: It seems to have been part of that shampoo and grooming treatment she was given in the last episode.
Hannah: I couldn't quite tell, because you don't get to see it that much.
Me: I think you'll see it a bit better in the clip that exists.

A surviving clip sees Polly being attacked by a Macra, but fortunately Ben still has enough presence of mind to come to her rescue.

Hannah: What does Ben think has grabbed her? Does he believe she's just waving her arms around and being lifted up by nothing? She's definitely had a haircut. I like it.

When the Doctor forces the Controller to reveal himself, he turns out to be a much older and dishevelled version of the man shown on the monitor. When his cover is blown and he finds himself suddenly dragged away by a giant claw, it becomes clear that the Macra are in control of the colony.

Hannah: It's like The Wizard of Oz, except he's a crab.

Episode 3

Hannah: Crabs are an interesting choice for a villain. I don't think they're particularly known for being clever, or even evil, but I suppose they're a little creepy and menacing because of the dangerous natural weaponry. I mean, I wouldn't want to meet a giant one, but it's odd to think of them being able to manipulate an entire colony.

As Jamie escapes from the gas mine, Hannah notices some very odd effects in the musical score.

Hannah: Has the composer started playing an Atari game?

Jamie finds himself in an old shaft full of dormant Macra. When the colony starts diverting poisonous gas in Jamie's direction, the Doctor surmises that it's not intended to kill Jamie; there's another reason altogether.

Hannah: To revive the Macra!

Sure enough, Jamie is having trouble with crabs.

Hannah: Their eyes look stupid.
Me: Because they light up?
Hannah: Yes, and also their weird shape and the way they point away from each other.

Episode 4

Hannah: I like it when the Doctor confuses people and then does a thing. He's a naughty man.

Jamie has managed to escape the Macra, only to find himself somewhere even more distressing: a cheerleading practice. Their "inspirational" propaganda chant is both excruciatingly spirited and genuinely sinister, and it's hard not to empathise with Hannah's assessment.

Hannah: I feel sick.

Fortunately the scene is lifted somewhat when Jamie is mistaken for an auditioning dancer and performs the Highland Fling, which culminates with him flinging himself out of the door. The cheerleaders seem to approve, but Hannah has her eyes on other things.

Hannah: Oh, they're really, really... they're basically wearing t-shirts!

A conflicted Ben identifies Jamie to the guards, but clearly regrets it.

Hannah: Oh, it's really sad! Ben is just watching himself from the inside, betraying everyone! I love the fact that there's a little bit of comedy in this, but it's really dark at the same time.

Thankfully Ben's conditioning wears off, and he comes to the rescue of his captive friends by triggering an explosion that destroys the Macra. Later, the colony holds a dance festival to celebrate its liberation.

Hannah: After the mind control has gone away, how do you look after yourself? You've had someone in charge of literally everything you've done for your whole life and suddenly you're given freedom. Is there a sequel novel? I'd love somebody to have written a re-visit to the colony. I want to know what they do next; do the rest of the hibernating Macra try to come up again and do the same thing? What do the Macra actually sound like? But I do understand why it's not addressed in this episode; you can't fit it all in, and they're supposed to be this mysterious terror.

The Doctor, keen to avoid being appointed as the new leader of the colony, follows Jamie's example and the four of them dance enthusiastically out of the door.

Me: I really wish we could see this.

The Score

Hannah: I really don't know how I feel about this story; it's not quite as well-told as I'd like, for such an amazing concept. A super-happy brainwashed colony of people living with crab overlords; I mean, how can that be anything other than a 10 out of 10? This is the one I'd most like to see properly so far, because I could probably give it a 10 if I actually saw it.
Me: The problem is that this story is a lot more visual than most of the others, so it's an awkward one to judge when you can't actually see it.
Hannah: I have a few little problems with the story, but overall I love it. Not just because it's crabs, but also I love weird cultural things where there's something profoundly different yet similar; as you say, it's like a horror story in Butlins.
Me: That's just Butlins.
Hannah: I went to one, it was alright. Except I got out-of-date drinks from the vending machine.
Me: Were you just expecting it to be a standard monster story?
Hannah: Yeah, I just thought it would be people having a problem with them and fighting them, that kind of thing. But no, it was people completely oblivious to them even existing. Completely oblivious to everything. "Why are we mining gas?" "Not a clue." It's a horrible concept that your entire life is being controlled by crabs who are using you as slaves and keeping you happy at the same time, but the story is fun and entertaining and gripping all the way through. Is it too soon for another 10?

On reflection, she has two main issues with the plot: the matter of how the Macra could have established their brainwashing equipment, and how that equipment could be so implausibly effective even after the subject has been confronted with actual Macra. After some serious consideration, she eventually decides to give The Macra Terror...

9/10

Hannah: It's almost a 10. But it's certainly the most entertaining so far.